Go, Go, Super Nanny

Super Nanny rocks. She doesn’t take any bull, but at the same time, she’s compassionate (and far more patient than I). I think it’s awesome how she tells parents to step up and instructs them in how to teach their children to behave appropriately.

I don’t mean to be judgmental. After all, I’m not a perfect parent either. Who is? However, when you see children hitting, kicking, biting, throwing things, screaming and swearing at their parents as well as others, well, it makes you think somebody’s not doing their job.

We’ve all seen these kinds of families. Maybe on TV or maybe in our own lives. You know the ones… if you saw them approaching your house you’d want to yell, “Hide! Pretend we’re not home!”

No one wants people to feel that way about their children.

Our Job

Bringing up children is a job, and not an easy one at that. But, we have to do our jobs. Kids don’t come with an owner’s manual and we all make mistakes. Yet, it’s completely irresponsible (Super Nanny even says lazy) to allow children to disrupt the household, the grocery store, restaurants, church, school, and other people’s homes and lives.

Parents simply cannot allow their children to violate other people’s rights with no consequences.

Consequences are a big issue. If behavior doesn’t have consequences, or in some cases rewards, there is no incentive to change that behavior. If a child gets his way every time he screams because his parents just want to shut him up, guess what? He’s going to keep screaming.

Follow Through

Parents have to be consistent.

“If you scream, you will not get anything. You will go to time out.”

Then, the parent has to follow through. Super Nanny has the parent silently return the child to time out, over and over, until the child gives in.

If the child is disruptive in public, give one warning that if the behavior continues you will stop what you’re doing and leave. I’ve found this to be very effective. If you actually have to leave, do it. Follow through.

Everyone will be happier

This isn’t about winning a power struggle so much as it’s about teaching children that we mean what we say. And, believe it or not, that’s what kids really want. They are not happy, clearly not happy, when they get their way all the time. They know they are not supposed to be in control. They feel insecure when they are. They want structure and boundaries and they want to know that their parents are in charge.

If you’re having trouble with your kids the best thing you can do is find an appropriate method and stick to it until it works. Things won’t change over night, but if you remain consistent, you’ll soon find life a lot less stressful and so will your kids (not to mention the people around you).